Tanning

I love tanning. It might not be good for your skin. It might not be good for the environment. It might not be good for your pocket book. I don't care, I still love it. There is something so serene about lying in the tanning bed, relaxing. It is pure unadulterated "me" time.

If you go tanning at a good salon, then you know what I mean. A bed with new bulbs, something that gives you a deeper tan so you don't feel like your skin is on fire. A bed with a nice fan inside to keep you cool, and maybe a built in CD player so you can drift off to dream land to your favorite reggae music.

I use an accelerator lotion so that my tan develops faster. I love it because it makes me smell tropical. It isn't greasy, but I do wipe it off with a towel when I am done. The first accelerator I used was called Fiji, I think. It had an ingredient called "tingle" in it. I don't care for tingle. It makes you skin literally tingle, and it also turns red hot. I often felt like I was going to overheat.

I mentioned this to the girl at the tanning salon and she suggested a different brand called Bronzer No. 9. I have been using this ever since and I love it. A lot of people don't think about engaging in a conversation with the kid behind the counter at the Tanning Salon, but think of it this way... They get free tans, they get free lotion samples, and that pretty much makes them the expert. They can tell you about what they like and what they don't like, and what works best for them.

I'm looking forward to going tanning today. I'm going for 11 minutes in a lay down bed... how relaxing!

It's My Birthday

Today is my birthday, and also my first day in the work week. At first I was a little bummed that I hadn't thought ahead of time to request off my birthday. Then I realized that I have no one to spend it with, and nothing to do, so what does it matter.

I work until 9:30 tonight and then open the next day. I think my boss might hate me. She might be trying to prevent me from going out. Well, jokes on her, because I am way to depressed to go out today anyway. I mean, I'm 30 years old. Who wouldn't be a little depressed about that? This is the first birthday that they officially sell those gaudy "Over the Hill" t-shirts for. I swear, if someone gets me one of those they are getting a death glare and a kick in the pants.

I'm really looking forward to this weekend. I just want to go out on Saturday and forget this whole birthday thing ever happened. I have a feeling that this week is going to be the longest week of my life. I wish I had a better outlook on things. I am trying really hard to do well at work. When you have to work with the stupid public all day, you can't go into it with a poor attitude like mine.

Hopefully, things turn around for me.

Valentine's Day

I've been sad on Valentine's Day before. I've been lonely on Valentine's Day before. I've been stood up on Valentine's Day before. I've been forgotten on Valentine's Day before. I've been hurt on Valentine's Day before. I've been in tears on Valentine's Day before. But not since I was 17 have I ever been single on Valentine's Day.

It's a little depressing. I'm glad I have the day off of work. I also feel a little guilty, like maybe someone with a significant other should have the day off and I should work, but whatever. I'm glad that I can just hide in my house and I don't have to look at anyone.

It's not that I want to be dating anyone in particular. Shoot, it's not even that I want to be dating at all. In fact, even if the opportunity to date came a long, I am 100% sure that I wouldn't take it. But there is something about this holiday that fills you with a feeling of complete and utter rejection. I seriously feel like the whole world is pointing at me and laughing.

Later today, I am going to my mom's house for my brother and my birthday dinner. He's turning 22 and I am turning the dreaded 30. At least I don't look 30. I'm pretty sure of that. I took this picture to prove it.

I may not be the best looking 30 year old, I may not be the youngest looking 30 year old, but I am pretty satisfied with myself. Even though I feel great when I look in the mirror, there is still that feeling that no one will ever like me. Could be because I was made to feel that way for the last 12 years. Bah! Valentine's day STINKS!

I Won With the hCG Diet

It occured to me as I was looking over my sad, lonely blog that I hadn't ever finished telling you how the hCG diet worked out for me. Truth is, it worked out AMAZINGLY. I lost 35lbs on the diet for the 44 days that I was taking the sublingual drops. I have been off of the drops for a month and a half now and I am still losing weight. I feel GREAT.

This picture was taken while I was still taking the hCG, and yes, I am even smaller now! I currently own, and am at this moment wearing, size 4 jeans! The jeans in the picture above are size 8! I was excited to be in a size 8,buts size 4? It just blows my mind. I shop in the Junior's section now... Did you hear that? The JUNIOR'S section.

I am doing so well with working out that my motabolism is raising. I'm losing weight even on the days that I don't work out. I have lost almost 6 pounds this week and I took the whole week off from the gym. I'm telling you, the hCG diet worked for me like magic! It gave me that leg up, that boost, that head start that I had been looking for! It kept me motivated and changed my life! I am so excited to be skinny and super HOT!

The Best Type of Animal Show!

Thanks for the post, Lorraine Gregory

Television is a multi faceted word. You can watch practically anything you want on your Television. Personally I use diret tv to find all of the channels that I want. I'm able to watch things about history, animals, warfare, technology and even food. I personally like to watch one specific type of television program and that is anything that has to do with any sort of animal. Animals are amazing. They come in all shapes and sizes and are living and breathing creatures. They create, they destroy and they have life cycles similar to ours.

One of my favorite animal shows is known as Animal Cops found on the Animal Planet channel. Animal cops is nice because it shows a good and a bad side to animal treatment. The cops that are doing the research and detective work absolutely love animals and will do almost anything for them. The people that they are prosecuting are the exact opposite. They abuse and do not treat their animals well at all. The cops go after these people and, in good episodes, get them arrested for their treatment towards their animals. The feeling that you get knowing that the cute puppy that had been abused his whole life is now going to a loving home while the abuser is being put away is a great one. There's nothing quite like it!

Lots Has Changed

Well internet, I'm back. Every once in a while I go on a hiatus. A vacation from the blog, if you will. This vacation was not very relaxing and I didn't enjoy my time away even a little bit.

Things have changed a lot for me over the last few weeks. To try and still be vague, let's just say that I live alone now. Just Caleb and myself in the house, and he isn't even there all the time.

Yes, that's right, internet. I am lonely. I am learning to deal with it. I am sure things will get better, in some way or another, but for the time being I am just taking it day by day.

In some ways, I feel like my life is over. In other ways, I feel like my life is just beginning. I am going to post several things over the next few days that will explain exactly what I mean. I don't want to lay all of my cards on the table at once. Stay tuned.