Let's say I try and bite you. How much is it gonna hurt? I'm...

February 28, 2010

I'd Pay For Jersey Shore Insurance

Would you pay to party with the cast from MTV's Jersey Shore? I wouldn't. I wouldn't even pay a measly $5 cover charge to get into a club if I knew they were there. I would purposefully avoid a club if I knew anyone from Jersey Shore was inside. I'd pay someone to promise to warn me if I was ever about to accidentally bump into someone from that cast.

Apparently, I'm the weird one. According to this TMZ article too many people want to get some JS action. I learned enough about the way they party from watching the TV show. It would be easier to just avoid anyone from that show and skip right to the morning after of guilt, shame, and regret.

Maybe I am being unfair. These are just normal people... Normal people who totally asked to be put into the spotlight, most of whom tried unceasingly to have sex with a different stranger every night. Um, no; I'm pretty sure these are the types of people that I try to avoid.

It's not that I am against regular people becoming sub D-list celebrities by means of reality TV. And I should probably state for the record, that I watched every single episode of Jersey Shore, including the reunion show!

Losing Weight Before Vacation!

Oh no! I realized something today! I'm less than two months away to a trip to Sacramento, CA for my cousin's wedding. That means I am going to be seeing my Asian side of the family. That means that I am going to need to get a $75,000 / year raise and lose about 60lbs to avoid ridicule.

I think I have the raise thing covered. I am going to go to an open house for a $300,000 home and take pictures and tell them it's mine. It doesn't even matter if there isn't any furniture in it because if I tell them I spent all the money on the house and have to sleep on the floor, I think that will be okay. Next, I have to rent a BMW and take some pictures of me driving it.

There isn't a way for me to fake the weight loss though. I don't think I can get to 60lbs in 2 months, but I'm prepared to wear a girdle if I can just get down small enough to fake it. I don't carry a lot of weight in my face, so I could also try to trim down a bit and fake being pregnant. Faking the pregnancy would be hard because eventually, I would have to fake a baby and I don't know how long I can keep up with a story like that.

February 27, 2010

Walking With Dinosaurs RULES

I found this picture online, but I wanted to use it instead of my own because I think it better conveys the impression of BEING IN THE FRONT ROW!!! That's right! We were in the FRONT ROW! See that empty seat right in front of the dinosaur's face? That's where we were! I even ducked when the T-Rex turned around because I thought its tail was going to hit me in the head. Of course it wouldn't have, but it sure looked like it!

The dinos were huge! They were so lifelike! Being in the front row, you could see the texture in their skin and some of them even had battle scars. When the T-Rex walked, its feet would stomp and you could see the muscles in its legs move. It was really an incredible experience.

The first hour, Caleb was in awe. He didn't really understand everything that was going on. Then, there was an intermission. The house lights came up and the announcer said that there was a 20 minute break. "More dinosaurs!" Caleb demanded. I convinced him that the dinosaurs were going potty and so we should go potty too. (He is wearing underwear all day now! Yay!) After the potty, Shawn went to get an overpriced bottle of water and Caleb demanded, "More Dinosaurs" as we settled into our seats.

The second hour, Caleb was all chattery. He talked about every dinosaur that came out. He remarked on how big they were and how loud they were. He talked about whether they were fast or slow. He also made several requests for "more baby dinosaurs". A young Torosaurus fought his elder for control of the herd. He won. Caleb clapped and said, "Yay"!

After the show was over, Caleb insisted on more dinosaurs. When we started to leave, it turned to pleas for more dinosaurs, we were on the verge of a meltdown when I found (dun-dun-DUN) a piece of candy in my pocket! Disaster averted. We rode the MAX train back to our car, which Cal thought was an adventure in its self. He fell asleep on the way home.

When we got home, Caleb woke up. He told me that he is a baby dinosaur, I am a Mama dinosaur, Shawn is a Dada dinosaur, and that he was going to go sleep in his dinosaur bed. I'm sure he's having dinosaur dreams right about now.

Walking With Dinosaurs

My birthday was a couple of weeks ago - I can hear your automatic "Happy Birthday" response, so thanks - and I spent the day at my parents' house.

"What's that commercial I saw on TV today? Something about dinosaurs?" said my mom.

"Walking With Dinosaurs! I really want to take Caleb!" I exclaimed.

"I'll give you tickets for your birthday." resolved my dad. He's always so practical.

Moments later he produced a check, which I am sure I would have gotten anyway, but this one was for the exact amount of 3 center stage, mid level tickets to Walking With Dinosaurs.

A few days later, I got online to buy my tickets. I really wanted to upgrade the seats to the front row, but with the service fees it was so much more expensive. So here is a Frugal Friday tip on a Saturday morning. I googled "rose quarter discounts coupons" and found a discount code. I was able to upgrade the tickets for only about $35 more!

So tonight is the night! I am so excited I have been counting down the days since last weekend. I stopped mentioning it to Caleb because every time anyone brings it up, he puts his coat on and walks to the door. He just doesn't understand the concept of time. This morning, however, I have been telling him that when the sun goes down and the moon comes up, we are going to see dinosaurs! We looked up some videos online and OHMIGOSH! This is going to be even better than I expected! The dinosaurs are so lifelike, and they are all life size. I can't wait to blog all about it!

February 26, 2010

Stop and Smell the Scentsy

My Scentsy warmer smells up my whole house like clean laundry, I would like you to know. I have it in my bedroom, and I can smell it throughout my entire home. I am growing deeper and deeper in love with it as the moments tic by. I thought one post would be enough, but I had to share this with you.

The smell that is wafting through my home is so good that it's distracting. Here are a few things that have happened only because I stopped to take a deep breath and smell the Scentsy:

Forgot where I put my purse - it was hanging on a hook in the bathroom
Forgot to pack up my computer
Forgot why I entered my room - did I come in here for something, or was I just following the scent of clean laundry?
Forgot to put on pants - at least I never left the house.

My room is so cozy and relaxing now that all I want to do is lie on my bed with the lights off. I want to get cozy next to the warm glow and fresh smell from my Scentsy. I'm serious people, I am totally in love. I think I am going to pick out another one for my living room.

I gave my mom the Lotus warmer and she loves it! She put it front and center on her fireplace mantle. In her ranch style home, her fireplace and her bedroom are on opposite sides of the house and as far apart as they can be without crossing the property line. I am in her room with the door shut, and I can still smell the warm and calming scent of Vanilla Suede coming from the Scentsy warmer.

I'm a huge fan. You can all look forward to being invited to my Scentsy party!


You know what I don't like about scented candles? It doesn't matter how long they have been lit, or how much fragrance they have brought to your room; at some point you have to blow them out. When that time comes, there is always that unavoidable smell of burnt wick with a curl of stinky black smoke. I really hate that smell, it ruins the whole experience for me.

I have finally found the perfect alternative to scented candles! They are called Scentsy and I love them! It's an electric warmer that slowly melts a scented brick of wax. There are dozens and dozens of warmers and scents to choose from.

Here is a little snippit from their website:

Scentsy is becoming the fastest growing candle company because Scentsy provides a safe alternative to the traditional candles that you have burned before. Scentsy Candles are flameless, wickless, leadless, and soot free, which makes them worry free! You no longer have to worry about harmful chemicals being released into the air that lessens the quality of life for you, your loved ones, friends, and pets.

This was especially important to me because Caleb is two now and he loves candles as well. Ever since he received a raving round of applause for blowing out the candles on his birthday cake he has been drawn to the flame of any fire, no matter how small, inconspicuous, high up on the mantle or hidden behind a picture frame it may be.

Right now I am using the cherry blossom warmer with a scent called "Clean Breeze" that smells like fresh dried laundry. It makes my whole room smell like a dryer sheet... Which is great because as I type this I spy my 90lb pitbull / boxer mix has snuck onto my bed and I guarantee you that he does not smell like laundry.

I'm suprised how quickly the warmer has started working. I can smell the fragrance wafting from the other room already and I just turned it on as I started to type this. I am probably doing about 65 WPM right now, so go ahead and do the math, you're more than welcome!

I am just about to leave and head to my mom's to deliver the "Lotus" warmer with "Plumeria" scent that I got as a suprised for her! I will post more about her fabulous reaction.

If you want to see more Scentsy warmers, check out http://sheilatower.scentsy.us
I very highly recommend it!

Verifying my blog

I'm trying to verify my blog for a website. They wanted me to post this randomly generated sentence. The instructions say that I can delete the post later. But who would want to when the sentence is:

Whatever hatred saves the number.

Sounds like an emo song. I like it.

- Posted using BlogPress from my iPhone

Teeny Tiny Computer

It just recently occured to me that this iPhone is a teeny tiny computer. Wait no. I knew it was a teeny tiny computer, but it didn't hit me that there would probably be a blogger app until just now.

Of course with over 140,000 applications available for iPhone there was bound to be one, right? Of course! I quickly found this app called BlogPress Lite in the app store on my phone. This is my first post using the app an I am pretty impressed.

My last phone was a blackberry bold 9000. I loved the phone but there wasn't a blogging app. I had to access the website on the phone's browser. This was pretty functional, but was sometimes hard to manage. I had mobile blogging configured but that disabled me from adding titles or picture.

All things considered, I am a mere 4 paragraphs in and this is so far my favorite mobile blog experience. I like it so much that I think I will return to my normal blogging habbits. Ooh. I just discovered a camera button... Could it be?

Oh my goodness it totally is! This application is great! If this blog posts then I don't think I will have a single complaint.

Check out the picture, huh? Jena did my hair for my birthday. She is leasing a chair at fantasy cuts and colors in Vancouver. If you heck her out, tell her the Crystal sent you! That's right, you're witnessing my mad networking skills.


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